Kimberly K. Parker: Process vs. Product: The Joys of the Means to an End

Parents are the most goal-minded individuals I have ever encountered. But, of course! We must ensure schedules and plans are in place to help us effectively govern our day-to-day activities. I dare not exhaust the “things-to-do list” filled with household management items, J-O-B deadlines, and children activities. It seems to never cease! Typically, moms and dads wake up with a clear picture of how the day will end…before it begins!

Spontaneity, which is not my “friend”, backed me into a corner one evening as I extended the invitation to play Scrabble® with my son…on a school night! Merely seconds away from hyperventilating after coming to my senses (a school night?), I grabbed the game with haste, removed it from the box, and positioned myself comfortably on my living room floor. My son was thrilled, to say the least. Guardedly he stated, “Momma, but it’s a school night. This is cool!”

Our game commenced and for the next fifteen minutes the flow was quite nice. Suddenly, in the midst thereof, I felt an overwhelming urge to read the rules.

I just had to be certain that we were honoring the intentions of its creator precisely. While my objective was to win, attaining victory properly was my true purpose! My son, who was waiting patiently to resume playing, turned to me and said, “Momma, can we please just have fun?”

It does not take much for me to pump my breaks! Such a simple request from one who was in this Scrabble® competition for the sheer love of playing with his Momma!

Then, it dawned on me: I was operating with a perfectionist mentality and was missing out on the joys of spending time with him in this manner. I was focused on the product (playing and winning the game as designed) and not the process (the loads of fun I could have with my son).

Once I dropped the paper and pushed it to the side, I was able to relax and have a ball! Now, some of the words we created surely did not exist, but who cared? Sore stomachs, tussling over a letter or two, and praying for a chance to use the letter “Q” filled the remainder of our evening. LOL! What a great, spontaneous, non-hyperventilating moment from that point forward! And, I totally became “one cool Momma!”

I’d love to hear from you! Feel free to share your comments with me.

Thank you.

Kimberly K. Parker is an author and blogger living in Maryland with her husband and three children. Visit her website at www.writingmomma.com to read more about her and the work she is doing in her community.

Special Educational Journal

Greetings Engaged Parents and Dedicated Educators,


This is an educational Journal discussion you do not want to miss. Mothers and daughters are encouraged to participate in this incredible night of conversation.

Parents and PGCPS is proud to announce a special edition of Educational journal this Wednesday, October 27, 2010 from 7:00pm-8:00pm. This special edition of Eduational Journal will focus on African American women.

Our first guest is Shirley Henderson, Associate Editor of Ebony Magazine. In its September edition, Ebony saluted the amazing royalty of African American women with its annual feature of the Campus Queens of HBCUs. Ebony showcased 35 Queens of HBCUs in its Campus Queens Online poll. Ebony wanted to make this a very unique and memorable salute to the Majesties of HBCUs and thus allowed its readers to vote on their favorite queens. In a close, but exciting race, the top ten vote getters were profiled in style with photos taken by celebrity photographer Derek Blanks. What we saw and read was a mosaic of beauty, brains, charisma and hopefulness for the future. Ms. Henderson will share the vision behind her amazing article and the photos of the remarkable Campus Queens of HBCUs with host Michel Davis-Robinson.

In part two of this special Educational Journal, we have invited Judge Mary Terrell to discuss the importance of engaging young African American women early with regards to education, life goals and career aspirations. Judge Terrell is an educator and youth advocate. She has spent over 20 years training teachers, administrators and developing educational programs for inner city youth to deter them from the criminal justice system. Her experiences and deep concern for our youth led her to create The High Tea Society, Inc., a non-profit organization for inner city girls ages 9-18 who attend the District of Columbia Public Schools and live in economically challenged communities. The goal of the High Tea Society is to increase the economic and social mobility of inner-city girls from economically disadvantaged areas through exposure to music, literature, poetry, history, career planning, self-esteem workshops, etiquette, and alternative lifestyles. Through various programs, the HTS promotes civility and the development of the social skills needed to be successful in a civil society and in the global community.


Be sure to join us for a remarkable night as we discuss the uniqueness of African American women.

When: October 27, 2010
Time: 8:00pm-9:00pm (EST)
Call in number: 1 (914) 803-4591
Website: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/educationaljournal

Take The "Dad's Pledge of Engagement"

Hello Engaged Parents and Dedicated Educators,

Please talk to the men, dads, fathters, unciles and other significant male role models in the lives of children to take the "Dad's Pledge of Engagement"

Forest Of The Rain Productions recognizes that fathers and significant male role models have a considerable role in the academic success of children. Forest Of The Rain Productions acknowledges parents are their children's first and most influential teachers.

We are also acknowledging the successes of students are enhanced when an unbreakable partnership between home and school is created. To solidify this partnership; Forest Of The Rain Productions are asking DADS and significant male role models in the lives of Public Schools students to join us in pledging to remain engaged in the academic lives of students. We are asking DADS to pledge to:

• Observe my child’s classroom at least twice a year


• Attend a non-sports related school event


• Visit my child’s school website for information


• Join and participate in a school’s formal parent organization


• Volunteer in my child’s school


• Attend an informational workshop held at my child’s school


• Attend a school board meeting


• Assist my child with homework assignments


• Review and understand requirements for High School graduation


• Review and understand the role and expectations of an incoming 9th grader


• Participate in at least one Parent Teacher Conference
  

Visit the Men Make A Difference Day website: www.menmakeadifferenceday.com